Talking with teens

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“why fit in when you were born to stand out? -Dr. Suess

It has been a busy week and even though I have a beautiful new laptop and plenty to say on a multitude of subjects, I took a little hiatus to catch up with friends and hang out with my daughters. It may seem a little lazy but below is a quote taken directly from Facebook, it is advice I gave to my daughters thirteen year old friend after a post she made about society and it’s ugliness. So many teens feel that they are not good enough, not skinny enough, not pretty enough, unloved and unwanted.

Why is this? Are we as parents letting our kids know how loved, beautiful and important they are. Are we teaching them the true meaning of beautiful?

I think of my children when they were first born, as pure as the mountain air. All of our children were born that way. Who taught them to hate themselves, dislike their bodies, feel they weren’t good enough? Who taught them to judge themselves and others by an unrealistic version of perfect?

Every single person that notices that something is wrong in society has a responsibility to help change it, man, woman or child. We will never right all the wrongs in the world but we can begin by loving ourselves and showing our children how important that is. If a person truly loves themselves they will love others, not for the clothes they wear, their body type or the way they wear their hair.

Self love is the most important kind of love. When a child loves themselves they make healthy decisions that are in their best interests as an expression of how they feel about themselves. People with no self worth make bad choices inviting people into their lives that can do them harm.

I could rant on about this for hours. I have a teenage daughter that I have to constantly prepare for the big bad world. I have found that the two best ways to teach my daughter how to love herself are:

A) Love myself. Show her I love who I am, with all my quirks and flaws, I embrace all that I am.

B) Love her. Love her enough to say no to her and have her dislike me, show her boundaries and teach her right from wrong. Love her even when I don’t like her much. Focus on the qualities that make her beautiful, her kindness, her enthusiasm, her compassion, her desire to help others. Teach her that happiness is beautiful and that true beauty shines through perceived flaws.

“Wherever you are in life be the soul of that place. The first step in changing society is changing yourself and realizing that imperfect is perfect. Beauty is everywhere and it can’t often be seen with your eyes but it sure can be felt with the heart. Be the light in a world of darkness…that will be amazing. ♥”

Carefree-Weekly photo Challenge

I have a lot of shots that could fit into this category but I think this one signifies total abandonment of   inhibitions which to me is Carefree. This is on a summer trip to remote British Columbia, far away from city life. The quietly encouraging sunshine watches over her and the only sound my daughter is hearing is the beat of her own heart-Carefree

 

Summer memories make everything feel magical to me — carefree and untroubled.

Even on the trips where everything went wrong, I look back and smile at the narrow escapes, or the long walks on a beach while I sorted out and righted the world.

Whether a good memory was made in years past, yesterday, or only moments ago, I love letting the nostalgia wrap me up — like a borrowed sweater on a cold summer night. Even more, I love making new memories: a carefree summer at the lake, a stroll through the park, dancing in the rain… then all I need to do is remember, and the same carefree feeling washes over me.

In a new post specifically for this challenge, share a photo that means CAREFREE to you!

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2013/08/16/photo-challenge-carefree/

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Weekly Photo Challenge’-One Shot, two ways

One Shot, Two Ways. This week, photographer Jeff talked about his process of finding the best shot. Before taking a picture, he studies his scene — looking at a shot horizontally (as a landscape) and vertically (as a portrait). With this honed, critical eye, he decides what orientation works best for his photograph.For this challenge, capture two images — a horizontal and a vertical version — of the same scene or subject. There are no concrete “rules” here, but a) it should be evident that both shots are of the same place/location or person/thing, and b) your photographs should ideally have been taken during the same shoot — where’s the challenge if you’re just plucking out pictures of a particular location or person from your archives?

I chose my garden as the subject, in particul a whimsical pink poppy. Flowers are so delicate and beautiful and you can capture something totally different when viewing from different angles. I took a portrait shot and a landscape looking from above.

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2013/08/09/one-shot-two-ways/#more-32811

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Simple Things

My grandmother Bernice was born January 5 of 1925. It’s easy to describe her but I am not sure that a description could quite do her justice. She was very simple, but not in the way that you would describe someone who was “not the sharpest knife in the drawer”, more like  ” She was two dimes short of a quarter! ” and when I say that I mean that money and material things didn’t mean anything to my grandmother. She was sensible and practical and she absolutely wanted to be surrounded by nice things, nice things to her were her family and friends. Her name, Bernice means shining star and she most definitely was the bright light that lit up our world. I can’t describe any grand gestures that made this so, I can only say that she was simply herself and in that we all felt comfortable in being ourselves. She never wanted for more, she wanted to have enough. She was a remarkable woman and I will love and treasure her memory always. The best compliment my husband ever gave to me was to say that my grandmother was one of the best people he ever met. I agree. I also like to think that there is a part of her in me that keeps shining.

We strive for all sorts of things in our lives that we think we will make us happy but my grandmother taught me that happiness is a lot simpler then we think.

Things we think will make us happy

1. Being Wealthy
2. Being thin
3. Being loved
4. Pretty things
5. A nice home

Things that will actually make us happy

1. Measuring wealth by the people you have in your life
2.Being healthy
3. Loving yourself
4. Things that can’t be seen, only felt
5. A home filled with love and laughter

Sometimes the things we stress about have simple answers. I find myself often looking up to the heavens and wondering what my grandmother would do.

♥♥

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Let it Rain

I am sitting in my quiet living room, the soft tap tap of rain on the rooftop the only accompaniment to my wandering thoughts.

I am trying to pinpoint why I love the rain. Nobody appreciates a cloudless blue sky with the sun warm on my face any more then I do but the truth is I love the rain too. It’s a little cool in here with the windows open but I just grabbed my favorite soft fleece blanket and curled up on the coach.  There is plenty I should be doing and could be doing but I have chosen to take a break and enjoy the soft sounds of mother nature bathing the earth.

I even like thunder and lightning.  When I was kid we used to have to sit in the hallway during storms as my mother was terrified of thunder and lightning,  as was her mother. I don’t know how that despite their fears I developed such a facination for booming thunder or electric bolts lighting up the sky but I did.

Nature can be a thing of immeasurable beauty or at times what we think to be cruel and punishing but it should always be respected.

“Nature is not cruel, only pitilessly indifferent. This is one of the hardest lessons for humans to learn. We cannot admit that things might be neither good nor evil, neither cruel nor kind, but simply callous – indifferent to all suffering, lacking all purpose.”

Richard Dawkins ~ River Out of Eden: A Darwinian View of Life

“We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature – trees, flowers, grass – grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence… We need silence to be able to touch souls” Mother Teresa

So no matter what you believe in Nature can teach us all something about life because although nature may not be in a hurry everything gets accomplished. For those of you hurrying through your life today please take an extra minute  to smell the roses, smile at a stranger, hold a door, lend a hand, share a laugh or simply take a moment to appreciate the quiet beauty around you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qmVn6b7DdpA&feature=youtube_gdata_player

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